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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-07-07 04:57
Subject: (no subject)
Security: Public

Anyone who says "That person has too much time on their hands" should be beaten with a fiberglass rod if they spend more than 2 hours of TV per month.




I'm getting very irritated with people saying this so I looked up the average:

According to the A.C. Nielsen Co., the average American watches more than 4 hours of TV each day (or 28 hours/week, or 2 months of nonstop TV-watching per year). In a 65-year life, that person will have spent 9 years glued to the tube. Compiled by TV-Free America; 1322 18th Street, NW ; Washington, DC 20036
(202) 887-4036

Think about that. Most people spend more time in front of tv than I spend on the internet.

SO fuck everyone


Millions of Americans are so hooked on television that they fit the criteria for substance abuse as defined in the official psychiatric manual, according to Rutgers University psychologist and TV-Free America board member Robert Kubey. Heavy TV viewers exhibit five dependency symptoms--two more than necessary to arrive at a clinical diagnosis of substance abuse. These include: 1) using TV as a sedative; 2) indiscriminate viewing; 3) feeling loss of control while viewing; 4) feeling angry with oneself for watching too much; 5) inability to stop watching; and 6) feeling miserable when kept from watching.


So they spend more time than I spend drinking watching TV


8 hours for sleep
8 hours for work
45 minutes for lunch
one hour for dinner
1.5 total commute time
4 hours for TV





TOTAL:1 hour 45 minutes for raising children, being married, grocery shopping, being a human.




I REALLY AND HONESTLY just realized how many hours a day people spend watching tv.



I'm not a kill your tv person, but I really haven't "watched tv" the way normal people do, ever, I guess.


4 hours ... that's fucking amazing

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-06-26 04:03
Subject: Omegle.com where you can chat with people you don't know for no real reason
Security: Public

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hello
You: what's black and comes in little white cans?
Stranger: um
Stranger: idk......
You: Michael Jackson
Your conversational partner has disconnected.



Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: what's the difference between michael jackson and an astronaut?
Stranger: do not know
You: an astronaut walks on the moon....and michael jackson fucks little boys in the ass
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


new king of pop

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-06-25 09:40
Subject: Yes, I am Stupid
Security: Public

http://www.amazon.com/Post-654-18CP-Canary-Yellow-Cabinet/dp/B000NNULIU/ref=pd_ybh_3?pf_rd_p=280800601&pf_rd_s=center-2&pf_rd_t=1501&pf_rd_i=ybh&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=15R6PP6BR7MBVWA4JZ12


feel free to add your own review

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-06-25 00:59
Subject: This is the Reason I Missed Out on TIT JOKES
Security: Public

Is anyone else getting error messages when they try to comment in other journals?

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-06-24 06:45
Subject: not a joke
Security: Public

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-06-22 06:09
Subject: fail
Security: Public

http://www.crazydogtshirts.com/servlet/the-%2412.99-and-Under/Categories

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-06-22 02:07
Subject: CLINT CONTEST!!!
Security: Public

I want you to find the worst "erotic story" that you can. When I say bad it can mean anything, spelling grammar, disgusting, demented, just plain not sexy, whatever to you qualifies as the worst. After you submit the worst of the worst I will make a poll and it will go down to voting. The one piece of advice I will give is on the internets novelty often wins over shock value as many of us have been left more or less unshockable.

If you think that is bullshit, remember the first time you saw goatse.cx and think of how tame that is now.

I will hype up this contest if I get decent submissions. Here is something just to get you motivated

On this night however, he would be getting into areas of
his nature he never thought possible. As he sauntered
into the freezing room where the bodies where kept. He
was supposed to work on one specific corps, she was in
drawer number 44. He walked wearily over to where the
rows of bodies where housed and opened that drawer. He
was taken aback to see who this particular dead body was.

"Hell that's got to be one of those Olsen girls," he said
to himself in amazement. He recognized the form, because
those two starlets were an idol for his little girl.

The next thing that happened to the tired family man as
he peered down at the cooling dead twin shocked him. His
cock began to grow in his slacks. The Devil took over his
senses. He'd always wanted to fuck those two annoying
little girls. And if he couldn't see his daughter in that
skimpy cheerleaders outfit. Why not use this kid for a
model? After all, nobody was around. He'd never be
caught. He had the keys, and nobody else was due to
arrive for hours yet.

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-06-20 08:38
Subject: Writer's Block: Local Favorite
Security: Public
Tags:writer's block

What's your favorite thing to show out-of-town guests when they come to visit?

Submitted By [info]mercyb


View other answers





my dick




Thank you. I'll be here all year, remember the July show is completely different than the June show

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-06-19 03:55
Subject: Remember That Game Where You Stump Google?
Security: Public

It gets harder every year

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&client=firefox-a&rls=com.ubuntu%3Aen-US%3Aunofficial&hs=BkS&q=dick+cheney%27s+vagina+tent+factory+on+fire+at+absolute+zero+on+mars+with+fucking+space+lasers+and+cyborg+velocoraptor+gaurdians&aq=o&oq=&aqi=


For reasons I will not go into I was originally looking for a tent whose flaps resembled a vagina

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-06-17 17:21
Subject: What I Did to Save Freedom Today
Security: Public

While waiting on a response from Daimiel (that never came)



http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/doc/w4m/1225821137.html

and also the "dirty" version in casual encounters. I have no idea why I do this. It's not like no one else is trolling CL.

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-06-17 02:48
Subject: Today
Security: Public

The re-enlistment NCO came to see me today because I either had to re-enlist or waive my right to re-enlistation.


When you waive your right to re-enlist you have to write what you intend to do after the army. I wrote,

"Become a ninja for hire, possibly for good possibly for evil."


He said, "You know this goes all the way to Core, right?"

(shrug), "Meh"

Somewhere someone in the army is going to have to categorize ninja for hire as a career path. I would probably file it under "Private security"

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-06-11 15:53
Subject: (no subject)
Security: Public

If terrorists in lockup at Gitmo were using toilet facilities that looked like ours it would be on the cover of newsweek. Seriously because the army is full of dipshits they can't even get the local national contractors to clean the toilets they are contracted to clean. It's like a perpetual last day of the county fair here, if your county is 120 degrees.


They don't even use the blue water. Imagine what 15 gallons of urine in a 140 degree plastic phone booth smells like






This reminds me of the time in august I was flying back home about to go to Iraq when I heard the newsperson complaining that the inmates at Gitmo were being served "Low quality high fat processed meals" and reflected on the fact the meals they were complaining about were in fact MREs

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-05-16 05:19
Subject: Unabashed Stupidity
Security: Public

I know all youtube comments are fucking retarded, but seriously


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hJV1qIcWyio


I have no music and the internet here (which is 85 a month) is not fast enough to stream music from last.fm :(


EBAY is not letting me change my address to my new address because they are retarded. :(


There are only two hot meals a day and none on sunday :(

It is hot :(

There are only porta johns where I am and they are only cleaned once a week :(((((((((((((


Time to go paint more of my plywood furniture Garry Owen blue (it's the only color I have)

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-05-14 13:40
Subject: (no subject)
Security: Public

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-05-13 02:47
Subject: (no subject)
Security: Public

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-04-26 21:41
Subject: Remember Last Time?
Security: Public

When I thought I was coming back in November and didn't?


I might stay even longer this time



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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-04-26 06:02
Subject: I make a lot of faces
Security: Public

I was using our army laser tag gear to look like a mad bomber but SOMEBODY ruined it. I could brush him out if I really cared





That's Mike Jones the rapper. It's true

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-04-19 13:54
Subject: No longer OPSEC
Security: Public

After 18 months regular pictures of Iraq are downgraded from operational security issues and can be shared with the world. I chose to do it on youtube

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-04-17 14:52
Subject: (no subject)
Security: Public

can you find the fail?
http://improvefirefox.com/customize-firefox-gui/

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A Drink For All Ages
Date: 2009-04-17 12:35
Subject: Writer's Block: Starting from Scratch
Security: Public
Tags:in plain sight, ips qotd, starting from scratch, writer's block

What would be the best thing about entering the Witness Protection Program and getting to start your life from scratch? The worst?

Sponsored by "In Plain Sight" on USA Network. Season 2 premieres Sunday, April 19 at 10/9C.


View other answers




Not having to go back to Iraq.


The worst would be that they would probably relocate me somewhere in Texas or the midwest. At least I am allowed to shoot at the Iraqis.

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